A Breakthrough

So I have learned yet another very valuable lesson in life…it is next to impossible to change another person or my relationship with them without first changing myself.

When I am hurt or disappointed by another person, I am naturally inclined to think they are the one who needs to make an effort to change or “fix” the relationship. Life is very short and I feel I have wasted way too much time and energy trying to win an argument and proving my point. Arguing and being angry got me nowhere and only made the relationship worse. It’s not all about winning or being right, it’s about being happy and having peace within.

After many failed attempts to repair a broken relationship, I decided to try a totally different approach. I made the decision to change myself, my attitudes and the way I relate to them. I have no control over another’s behaviors, but I do have control over my own. I asked God to change my heart and allow me to forgive and let go of the past. It was not easy and certainly not instantaneous but after much work and prayer, I have finally found it in myself to give complete forgiveness, to leave the past in the past and start fresh.

Learning to forgive has been the key and is one the most liberating things I have ever done. It has shattered the shackles of pain of my past and provided me with complete freedom from my bitterness in the present. It’s kind of like taking out the old piled up smelly garbage and disposing of it once and for all, leaving the house fresh and clean. I no longer react to their negative attitudes, when the conversation goes negative, I immediately change it to the positive and I stand strong and only show love and gentleness towards them.

I have prayed for God to change me and He has. What is even more amazing is that the changes that have occurred in my heart have manifested into the same sort of change in the other person. Once they began to experience a more loving and positive attitude from me, they responded with the same loving and caring behavior. I believe that once someone sees a light beam in your heart they will naturally respond positively to it and want to have the same peace you have.

Our relationship is by no means perfect now but it is finally starting to resemble the one which God intended for us to have. WOW, that is so awesome…why did it take me so long to figure this out???

Happy New Year!

As we welcome in the New Year, I look back at 2008 and can’t help but just praise God for the wonderful blessings that He has bestowed upon me this past year. It was truly one of my best years as I was blessed with restored health, restored vision, wonderful new relationships, repaired broken relationships, a new church to call home, a new home to live in, a better job location and not one vacation of a lifetime, but two! All of which, in humanistic thinking, should never have been possible but as we all know, with God, all things are possible.

In these times of a troubled economy and a broken world, we may seem to be a little anxious about what 2009 will bring. For 2009, It is my prayer that God will continue to bless my family, friends and myself. For Him to hold us all in the palm of His hands protecting us and providing for our every need. That we always remember to praise Him not only for our blessings but also for our trials.

I am also praying that 2009 will not only bring a New Year number for us, but also a new and even deeper faith to trust in Him and rely on Him completely, a renewed and closer walk with Him, a new and greater spiritual insight to deal with trials that may come our way and a year filled with new adventures, new opportunities and new friendships. I pray that He helps us to look forward to the New Year with confidence, courage and humility. To help us look beyond what we can see with our eyes or what we can conceive in our minds to the greater future that He has perfectly planned for us.