Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Its all about hope and encouragement

I am so blessed to have an amazing testimony of God’s healing grace. It has been on my heart for a long time to write my story down on paper so that I can share it with others. As with a lot of things in life, I keep procrastinating on this, thinking I will write it all down when I have more time. My dear friend Ronda has recently reminded me that I NEED to do this soon and stop putting it off. She always manages to encourage me to do the things I keep saying I am going to do but never make the time. Reading a good book, starting a bible study, baptism, joining a lifegroup...the list goes on… I always love a good challenge and she has certainly managed to challenge me spiritually. She gives me so much hope and encouragement.

As I sit to write this testimony, I am reminded of the obstacle that always seems to hinder my progress – Guilt. I always seem to question why has God blessed me so much when there are many who were not as sick as I who have not made it this far. Would anybody who is so sick and is suffering really want to hear my story?

As I was sitting in my office today contemplating over what to write and where to possibly begin, the regional president of our bank walked in as he had come to our branch for a visit. We began to talk about his wife who is battling stage 4 cancer and is really ill. As I listened to him talk of the dreadful diagnosis and of her poor condition, my heart sank deep into my chest. I could see deep sadness in his eyes as he talked of her situation. But despite the bleak diagnosis, he talked of their faith and the hope they had that she would recover. What could I possibly say to him? Yes, I had experienced my share of bad diagnosis and suffering but never on such as level as his wife. I gave him a hug and wished him my best and all I could think of was to tell him the story of my recent miracle of restored vision. As I told the story I am thinking to myself, I must sound so stupid telling this story to a man whose wife is suffering from stage 4 cancer. How could it possibly compare?? I must have sounded so cheesy.

Contrary to my belief, he was so excited for me. He thanked me for sharing my story and told me that was just what he needed to hear that day. He said, “You give me hope and encouragement.” Wow!! I was so humbled to hear that. After he left, I told the story to my coworker and the guilt that I felt as I asked what could I have possibly done to deserve God’s amazing grace? The truth is, nothing. There is nothing I could ever possibly do to deserve His mercy and grace. It is simply His gift to me.
She told me to read her devotional for that day and I was blown away as I knew God was talking directly to me…

THIS IS A TIME OF ABUNDANCE in your life. Enjoy your blessings. Your cup runneth over with blessings. After ploddig uphill for many weeks, you are now traipsing through lush meadows drenched in warm sunshine.. I want you to enjoy to the full this time of ease and refreshment. I delight in providing it for you.
Sometimes my children hesitate to receive My good gifts with open hands. Feelings of false guilt creep in, telling them they don’t deserve to be so richly blessed. This is nonsense thinking, because no one deserves anything from me. My kingdom is not about earning and deserving; it’s about believing and receiving.
When a child of Mine balks at accepting My gifts, I am deeply grieved. When you receive My abundant blessings with a grateful heart, I rejoice. My pleasure in receiving flow together in joyous harmony.

Wow, I needed to hear that! I know now that my healing is a special gift from God that He truly wants me to have and I will praise him forever! My prayer is that God can speak through me to write the best testimony to glorify His name and give others hope and encouragement.

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